For a fleeting moment I knew what key my tinnitus[1] is in and bolted out into the living room to grab one of the electronic keyboards and a set of headphones to confirm it. Unfortunately Vogon was asleep and Laurel was watching TV, and its horizontal scan rate noise throws my perception. I am ready to unplug that irritation box. Vogon assures me LCD television sets do not make that noise (the one we own is in his study and not the living room), but the harmonic between the TV and my tinnitus has been annoying the crap out of me since I quit watching TV last month. DO NOT WANT that noise.

I'm going to hole up in the bedroom again with more soothing BBC World Service and get back to reading Oliver Sacks. I smile every time he references Jourdain and all the mentions of plasticity. Does neuroplasticity count as a fandom?

I am tired of the TV-noise and need to either cajole Vogon into enabling wireless connectivity or just run a network cable into the bedroom so I can have internets without the torture of TV-noise. I keep having good ideas spoiled by hearing the same few episodes of iCarly, Hannah Montana, and Wizards of Waverly Place. Sufficiently annoyed by TV-noise, I would happily beat up all of their casts and knock Billy Ray Cyrus about the head until he stops using that dreadful "kuntry" (misspelling intentional) dialect.

Good noise was on Selected Shorts this week, though; Percival Everett's "The Appropriation of Cultures" read by Ruben Santiago-Hudson. I laughed so hard I almost peed myself. The next time I see the Confederate flag, I will hear the story's main character say "That's the black power flag, brothers."


1. If I heard a high A continuously as Schumann did late in life, I would sell everything I own for any medical intervention to make it stop.