A cunning plan that failed, or something funny that happened while I was freezing my arse off.
If you saw my Facebook status earlier today and were mildly confused: Vogon decided to part out and fry turkey at 2200 last night. He fried a few pieces at a time in the cast iron skillet and all went without incident until he got to the final batch. Oil got sloshed out of the pan and smoked, causing all of the hard-wired alarms to go off at 0030. I closed the cat in the bathroom, turned off the heat and we opened the doors to ventilate.
Eventually my eyes started stinging and I grabbed the nearest bottle of artificial tears. While blinking and standing in the open front doorway in my flannel PJs, my earworm played snippets of Dr. Horrible and when Vogon asked what I was chuckling at, I burst out "friggin' 'tard" and started laughing.
(It would have been a lot funnier if he'd actually seen Dr. Horrible.)