June 25th, 2002

Rosehip hunting in Alderfer

Jury Duty, part III.

We wrapped up deliberation late Monday morning. (For those of you wanting information, the case was People v. Chipman, Jefferson County District Court No. 00CR3080.) We decided on over a dozen counts, including criminal attempt first degree murder and several prohibited use of a weapon (aka "drunk with a gun") charges. Aside from the one clerical gaffe we made, we found the defendant guilty on all charges.

[The gaffe: One riding charge was accidentally rendered as not guilty. The verdict forms vary in whether guilty or not guilty is listed first, and somehow everyone missed that the foreman signed the "not guilty" line on that particular charge. The judge later assured us it will not make a significant difference in sentencing, so I'm not going to lose sleep over it.]

Highlights of the trial included several questions alluding to the defendant first meeting the victim in an AOL chatroom, the defendant's former lawyer (subpoenaed) not-so-subtly suggesting the defendant's ex-wife was gay, and some insanely amusing out-of-context quotes from both the judge and lawyers involved. For the next few weeks, I will probably cackle if you intone "You will have... her underwear!" the same way one of the prosecutors did in the closing statement. Ditto if you crack jokes about operating opaque viewers or tape players.

Meme: Melissa is... (Googlism)

I blame both you and you for tempting me into perpetuating the meme where you type "[name] is" into Google.

[Note: edited rather short because I'm (a) lazy and (b) uninspired right now.]

Melissa is a virus. ("Melissa is, literally, a social disease." -- Salon, March 1999.)

Melissa (Melissa officinalis L.) is also known as lemon balm.

MELISSA is a joint initiative of the World Bank and the European Union to promote and facilitate local environmental planning and management in Sub Saharan Africa.

Melissa is scared of everything.

Melissa is the recipient of many awards including a national and two regional Edward R. Murrow awards.

Melissa is a bit like a lake.

Melissa is a country-living Texas community with a population of approximately 1,500, located on Highway 5, 50 miles north of downtown Dallas.

Melissa is in many ways a "missing link" between cultures in southeastern Turkey, northern Syria, and Cyprus.

Melissa is also in demand for weddings, receptions and private parties.

Melissa is a black 17 inch toddler doll by Corolle.
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